So we all know what it’s like in the beachfront of life, right? Everyone wears the same feathers, scratching out a living on scraps with all their seagull buddies, trying to find an unoccupied fencepost, and laughing at all the slowly-roasting vacationers below. Except for THAT guy…
Yeah, him. He thinks your sports team is stupid, your music is noise, your college sports team is even MORE stupid, your politics naive, and chugging down your own weight in sardines with your frat buddies is about as appealing as shoving your beak into a belt sander. Twice.
Oh sure, he could sport the preppie white-n-gray plumage of the haute couture du jour, but brown and tan is just so much more comfortable, and useful as camouflage, and summer doesn’t last forever, dammit!
But it’s a big beach, after all. He doesn’t want your piece of it, just his. Besides, all the dropped Cheetos are under the gazebo, and no one ever throws an Alka-Seltzer at the hopping guy. Live and let live is his motto–but could you kindly stay downwind after the sardine benders? Thanks. ‘Preciate it.
So what are we to do with that guy? Give him his own blog? Or see what he has to say, below?